You haven’t felt like yourself for a while now.
You still get up for work. You still show up. But lately, your patience is short. You snapped at your teenage son the other day and you’re still carrying the guilt. Your partner keeps saying you’re “moody” and “not present.” And the truth is… they're not wrong.
You feel like the last few years have been full on—being something for everyone else, putting a brave face on it all, and telling yourself to pull your head in. Sometimes you feel invisible. Sometimes you feel like your family don’t ‘get you’. You wouldn’t want them to worry, or feel like you’re letting them down.
You’ve been at the same job for over twenty years. You’re grateful—but you’re also exhausted. Mortgage payments are climbing, bills feel endless, and while you're working hard to hold it all together, you're wondering… what about me?
If this sounds familiar, you're not alone. You're not broken. You're burning out. And there’s something you can do about it.
The Invisible Weight on Men's Shoulders
In Australia, men are taught early to “just get on with it.” Work hard. Don’t complain. Be the reliable one. But when life piles on—and keeps piling on—there’s a cost. Far too many men are silently struggling.
We call it burnout.
And here’s what you need to know:
- 1 in 8 men will experience depression
- 1 in 5 will experience anxiety at some point.
- Men make up 75% of suicide deaths, with middle-aged men at highest risk
- Less than 30% of men who need help will ask for it.
(Source: Beyond Blue)
Why? Because we’re taught to be stoic. Self-reliant. The “rock.”
But holding everything in doesn’t make you stronger. It just makes you tired. And eventually, it starts to leak out—irritability, rage, withdrawal, hopelessness.
It’s not weakness. It’s burnout. And it’s more common than you think.
How Burnout Can Look in Men
Burnout doesn’t always show up as tears or breakdowns. For many blokes, it looks like:
- Snapping over small things
- Feeling numb or disconnected
- Working longer hours to avoid being at home
- Trouble sleeping, or waking up already exhausted
- Losing interest in hobbies, mates, sex, or life in general
- Feeling like a “failure” even while doing everything right
Sound familiar? You’re not alone. You’re also not powerless.
You Don’t Need to Fix Everything. But You Do Need to Talk.
You don’t have to spill your guts to a therapist on Day 1. But you do need somewhere to talk, think, or even just be, without pressure to have it all figured out.
Here’s how to start:
👨🔧 Drop into a Men's Shed
The Australian Men's Shed Association supports local sheds across the country where blokes can come together for woodworking, tinkering, or just having a cuppa and a chat—no sign-up, no fuss.
📞 Call MensLine Australia – 1300 78 99 78
Free, 24/7, confidential support for men. You don’t need to give your name, and you can call anonymously.
📱 Try text or online chat
If talking feels too hard, services like Beyond Blue and Lifeline offer webchat and SMS options.
🧠 Check your work’s EAP
If your workplace uses Acorn EAP, you can get free, confidential counselling. You don’t have to tell your boss, and you can speak to someone who understands burnout, pressure, and what it means to be a man doing it tough.
Why It's Not Just You (and Never Was)
Lots of guys in their 40s and 50s feel this way. You've worked hard, built a life—but somehow lost a part of yourself in the process. You’re not the only one feeling stuck, or like you’re meant to be “further along,” or like no one would understand.
But here’s the thing: they would understand. Because they’re feeling it too.
Letting someone in—just a little—isn’t about making it someone else’s problem. It’s about giving yourself a chance to unload the weight you've been carrying alone.
Signs It’s Time to Reach Out
If you’re ticking off more than a couple of these, it's time to talk:
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Constant fatigue, even after a full night’s sleep
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Dreading the workday, every day
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Feeling numb, hopeless, or angry without knowing why
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Drinking more than usual to cope or sleep
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Thinking about leaving it all—but not knowing where to go
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Feeling like a failure, even while doing everything “right”
You Can’t Change Everything Overnight—But You Can Change Something Today
Here’s what the research shows (see: The Three Seas):
A short walk outside can lift your mood for hours
Talking to just one trusted person can halve your emotional load
Getting one solid night’s sleep can improve decision-making and patience
Doing something meaningful just for you—a hobby, music, even fixing something—can shift your mindset
You are not your job. Or your mortgage. Or your anger. Or your burnout.
A Note From Acorn EAP
We’ve walked alongside a lot of men like you—guys who felt stuck, fed up, and disconnected. And every time, they felt lighter after making the first move to talk.
It doesn’t need to be dramatic. It just needs to start.
We offer:
- Private counselling (in person, by phone, or video)
- Support for your partner and family
- Guided support for anger, burnout, and work stress
- No-fuss access—no referrals, no long waitlists
Explore what’s available: Acorn EAP Services
Final Thoughts
You’re not broken. You’ve just been carrying too much, for too long.
You don’t have to keep bottling it up. You don’t have to figure it all out alone. Whether it’s a chat with a mate, a call to MensLine, a visit to the Shed, or a quiet word with a counsellor—you deserve the same support you’d offer anyone else.
And you’re allowed to say: “I’m not okay—but I want to be.”
That’s not weakness. That’s the start of something better.
🔗 Helpful Links
MensLine Australia – 1300 78 99 78
Beyond Blue – Mental health support
Find your local Men’s Shed
The Three Seas – Understanding Depression
Acorn EAP Services
